Afghanistan

PTSD AWARENESS DAY

/ Katie Wigington / 1 Comment

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I’m not sure why we have to have specific days, weeks or months of the year to raise awareness on any number of issues that we should all be aware of all the time. I’m declaring today the day we recognize combat related PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and tomorrow too. And every day after that.
Combat PTSD has been front and center in the news for months. Maybe some people didn’t realize it though since not everyone calls a spade a shovel, like I do.
My awareness of combat related PTSD started long before it would personally affect me. Long before it was called PTSD. When I was about 10 years old, my mother told me that my favorite Great Uncle would “Never be the same after Iwo Jima.”  He never was.
Later, much later and shortly before his death at 89, he told me about piling the dead bodies and body parts and collecting their dog tags. He said he would never forget the carnage. There was no good war, he said.
Sixty –eight years after Iwo Jima (almost to the day) people are still in denial about Soldiers Heart, Shell Shock, Combat Fatigue, Post-Vietnam Syndrome and finally PTSD. It’s all the same – all these different names for the same thing.
The people in denial are the masses of Americans who may or may not read the news every day and for whatever reason are unable to connect the dots, the dots that are sometimes so blatant, so bright red, so screamingly apparent that I don’t know how anyone can miss them.  (I’m only talking about the US here- even though other countries have the same thing- some to such a degree the country as a whole may suffer.)
There are some military families that are in denial too. They think if their returning soldier or Marine just gets a job, just gets married, just has kids, just stops drinking, just comes out of their room, just acts normal, that everything will be fine. This is a stupid assumption and wishful thinking.
The more likely scenario is that these soldiers, sailors and Marines will come home from combat and try to assimilate but will not be able to relate to people who have not seen what they have seen nor done what they have had to do. They will drink too much, some will take medication (legal and illegal) some will take risks that no sane person would take, some will become sex addicts, some will become depressed and isolate, some will be angry, some will commit crimes and some will commit suicide. In fact, according to the US Department of Veterans Affairs, twenty–two veterans commit suicide a day. That is roughly one per 1.09 hours. Are you okay with that? I’m not.
Right now, there are approximately 21.5 Million Veterans in the United States. An estimated 62,619 are homeless. (I think that is a low estimate). The number of Veterans suffering from PTSD is almost impossible to figure since so often is it unreported and untreated and the Department of Veteran Affairs tracks it by conflict. Almost 50% of Vietnam vets suffered from PTSD. (They also had half the country hating them when they returned)  The Department of Veterans Affairs has quietly released a new report on post-traumatic stress disorder, showing that since 9/11, nearly 30 percent of the 834,463Iraq and Afghanistan War veterans treated at V.A. hospitals and clinics have been diagnosed with PTSD. (I would imagine the unreported would bring it up to 50%)
Now, you may wonder why I think you should be aware of these alarming numbers.  This is why. They need our help. They need understanding- and we have to educate ourselves so we don’t make the same mistakes the generation before us did with the Vietnam vets. The men and women coming home with PTSD are not feeling the love from their fellow Americans and in some cases they feel like their branch of service has used them up and then thrown them away. Sometimes it takes years for them to be able to work in the civilian world. Some may never get there. Some are so broken down they can barely function and need caregivers to make sure they get up, get dressed, eat and go to the VA.
We are talking about 22 year olds, 25 year olds, 30-year-old men, and women who may look twice their age due the overwhelming load they carry.  We – and by we I mean every single American, should be helping them carry the load.
The murder of Chris Kyle was a horrendous event and in my mind brought to the forefront how horrible PTSD can be… if we don’t learn to recognize it and deal with it as a by product of war. Plan on it, budget for it, have the medical facilities and faculty ready for it and most importantly, make it easier for these people to get the help they need.  Eddie Ray Routh had recently been released from the hospital- his parents pleas to the psychiatric hospital to keep him, fell on deaf ears. I have to wonder why? Was it money?
Most PTSD is not going to elevate to a murderous level, and maybe anger is not always part of combat PTSD, but it is often enough. The following are just some of the symptoms of combat related PTSD.
  • Irritability/ anger
  • Sleep difficulties and constant fatigue
  • Difficulty concentrating, remembering, thinking, making decisions
  • Depression
  • Guilt over killing a combatant or civilian
  • Guilt over the death or injury of a fellow warrior (survivors guilt)
  • Anxiety
  • Exaggerated startle response
  • Withdrawal from social activities and friends
  • An increase in accidents
  • An increase in taking unnecessary risks
  • Physical complaints (chronic pain)  and medical illness or fear of medical illness
  • A significant increase in the use of alcohol and other substances
  • Domestic violence
  • Misconduct issues or reprimands
The Soldiers, Marines, Airmen, and Sailors-  who volunteered to go into the service post 911 knew they could die. Of course, an 18 year old doesn’t really know what will happen to him if he lives to tell the story. In fact- few people will know what will happen. Parents themselves focus on one thing. Stay Alive. When they get home mom counts fingers and toes just like the day they were born. No visible damage and yay- everything is going to be fine.
For many of them, everything will be okay. For some, symptoms will not present for years. For others, the onset will be almost immediate- some before they are separated from the service.
The military has to do a better job. I was hopeful when General Shinseki the US Secretary of Veteran Affairs, was appointed to his position. Since that time, over four years ago, I have seen little progress in the area of combat related PTSD and the process that defeats many veterans 10 minutes after they walk through the VA doors.
There are civilians doing the job though. One such civilian is Dr.Bridget Cantrell. Dr. Cantrell is the founder of Hearts Toward Home International, which is a non profit organization dedicated to helping combat veterans and their family members. 
I first met Dr. Cantrell in 2006 at a Marines Parents Conference in Houston, Texas. My son, a Marine Corps Rifleman at the time, was getting ready to deploy to Iraq. Dr. Cantrell and her writing partner Chuck Dean, (a Vietnam vet) had just written Down Range, to Iraq and Back, A book that addresses PTSD our military personnel experience when returning from combat. After attending the panel discussion, I knew PTSD was something I had to fully understand. 
Since that time, Dr. Cantrell has helped me- help my son. She has written 3 more books Once a Warrior, Wired for Life, (with Chuck Dean)  Souls Under Siege: The Effects of Multiple Troop Deployments-and How to Weather the Storm and a workbook that accompanies Once a Warrior, and has two more coming out shortly.She devotes her life to helping these veterans.
There are other civilians doing their best to make a difference for our veterans. And together we can all make a difference.  First, though there has to be awareness, there has to be significant comprehension of what combat related PTSD is and what we as civilians can do to help. Removing the stigma is one way to help these men and women get the professional  help they need.
Let’s not wait for the PTSD Awareness Day (I think it’s sometime in June) . Let’s not wait until another Soldier, Sailor, Airmen or Marine hurts someone or commits suicide. Let’s start today. Spread the word-tell, let your Representativesand Senators  that you want to see some help for our veterans. If you can, donate or volunteer your time to the organizations that make a difference in the lives of these men and women.
And if you notice someone needing help, call the VA Hotline at  1-800-273-8255 Press 1
They fought for us- and now we need to fight for them.
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Additional resources from (USC) University of Southern California –

Military Mental Health Resource Guide to Depression, TBI & PTSD

And if you are interested in a career in  Military Social Work

MSW@USC

 

This is my Marine (who joined the USMC in 2003 the minute he turned 18) in a house in Iraq. Those are pictures of the Twin Towers on both sides of the mirror in the background. He wasn’t there to make money, or see the world, or get his college paid for. He was there because he thought he could make a difference. I think he did, and I can only repay him by making sure he and his brothers-in-arms, are taken care of. 
  
 

Creeping Democracy

/ Katie Wigington / Leave a comment
Perhaps, I am connecting dots that aren’t there, but lately I’ve been thinking about the rise of democracy or semblance thereof, in the Middle East and Arab countries and wondering if maybe- just maybe, the small acts of kindness many of our troops have made towards the predominantly Muslim people in countries we have been at war – have actually had some impact on a world-wide basis.
It could be a mother’s wishful thinking. It could be that I would like to be able to say to my son- See? Look what you started when you asked me to send you medicine for the Iraqi kids. Look what happened when you helped the tribal, western Iraqi’s living on the Syrian border get rid of the gun smugglers and al qaeda thugs? And see? Candy and stuffed animals were a good idea too.
Maybe it’s not such a stretch though.
Here is an excerpt from an article written about Nick’s unit (3/4) and company (Kilo) in 2006.

Story by Cpl. Michael S. Cifuentes, Combat Correspondent
3rd Battalion, 4th Marine Regiment
http://www.marine-corps-news.com/2006/11/western_anbars_senior_marine_c.htm

Col. William B. Crowe and Sgt. Maj. Jimmy D. Mashburn spent Thanksgiving Day visiting the Marines of the southern Calif.-based 3rd Battalion, 4th Marine Regiment, who are based in outposts in the northwest region of Al Anbar Province, Iraq. 
They’re foremost message was simply “thank you for what you are doing for this region.”

“I know it’s tough being away from your homes and families” said Mashburn to a group of Marines with 3/4. “But, you are doing an outstanding job here and we’re watching you from afar in Al Asad. 

RCT-7 is the Coalition Forces unit responsible for providing security to more than 30,000 square miles in western Anbar, stretching from the Syrian and Jordan borders, east to the Euphrates River. 

The sergeant major and colonel are based at the regimental headquarters in Al Asad. 3rd Battalion is one of RCT-7’s subordinate units in western Al Anbar Province.

The battalion is three months into a seven month Iraq deployment. They are tasked with patrolling the streets of the many cities that lie along this Euphrates River region, just miles east of the Iraq-Syria border. The Marines here face threats such as small-arms fire and improvised explosive devices (IEDs) every day while operating in the region. 
The battalion also works with Iraqi soldiers and police, mentoring them so Iraqi Security Forces can eventually provide security to their own country.

“It’s good to see Marines with aggression and control,” said Mashburn. “You are allowing the Iraqi citizens to taste freedom more and more, and at the same time, keeping them safe from the insurgency.” 
Since ¾’s arrival here in September, the Marines have successfully disarmed IEDs, captured wanted individuals and found weapons caches in their area of operation.

“‘No better friend, no worse enemy” holds true with [you all],” said Mashburn, quoting the 1st Marine Division”s motto. 
Along with securing the streets from adversaries, the Marines here have built a good rapport with its civilians. Husaybah, a city that borders Syria and was the setting of Operation Steel Curtain – a 2005 operation which pitted U.S. Marines and local Iraqi tribesmen against hundreds of insurgents – now hosts a flow of business in its market street, clear of insurgent activity. 

“If we can maintain security of their streets, we will have their [local populaces] support,” said Cpl. Carl G. Williams, a squad leader with the battalion’s Kilo Company. “They want the insurgency out just as much as we do, so our relationship with them is more of a ‘business” relationship.”          
                                        

The Good Guys

I met Col. Crowe at homecoming and spoke to him and his wife while we were excitedly waiting for the buses of Marines coming home from Iraq, after what turned into an 8 month, not 7-month deployment. He reiterated to me the incredible job the ¾ did, making headway with the locals and securing what was once known as the wild west.

Since they were so close to Syria, maybe it’s not so far fetched to think that word could travel from one positively affected person to another. My son told me in Husaybah, there were people who intermarried with Syrian citizens, so I know word could spread family to family.  It would take a while, with no facebook or cell phones at hand. But it’s been almost five years since this article was written- more than enough time to spread the word.

I think what we have to remember is- that our brand of democracy may not work for them. But if they manage to shift some thinking and attain some understanding of human rights, maybe some middle ground will be okay for them.

Our country may have been founded on Christian doctrine, but their countries were not. In civilizations as old as these, I don’t think we can expect thinking to change drastically in 10 years or even 20. We can all see a chink in the fragile glass though.  I would really like to think that US troops (in spite of Abu  Ghraib which set us back at least two years) made a difference- and that all of  the families who have sacrificed loved one’s, and all the troops who have sacrificed body parts and mental health, can look back on this time and see that what they did has made a difference and will continue to make a difference as long as the US supports freedom with the right mix of “aggression and control.”
 

Afghanistan will be a harder nut to crack. It faces warring tribes, corrupt government, and distrust of everyone, a strong Taliban influence and a wavering American ally, more than ready to leave the poppy fields and come home.  The recent assassination of Karzai’s corrupt brother spoke volumes if we were listening. Afghanistan is a war torn country whose opium trade is 1/3 of it’s GDP and no one is really ready to give up that source of income. According to a report by the CIA only about 28 percent of Afghans over age 15 can read and write, so training them to take care of their own country will be at the very least- slow and challenging.
If the same tactics are applied to Afghanistan, that were applied to Iraq, I think there will be hope that someday there will be a meeting of the minds. People will agree to disagree and find common ground. But I think it’s a long way off.  
Maybe it’s the mother coming out of me to be hopeful. Maybe not.  I’d like to think that I base my ideas on more than emotions and wishes. Maybe we will never know if the cases of Children’s Tylenol made a difference in that country- I know it made a difference in how I looked at my son when in the middle of the war- he worried about someone else more than he worried about himself.

Happy New Year 2011

/ Katie Wigington / Leave a comment
I had no great expectations for 2010. My goal was to stay alive, keep a roof over my head and hang on to my job. My wants were few. I wanted to be content if not joyous; I wanted my family to be happy and healthy. I wanted to write and hoped I would write something good enough to submit. I wanted to be there for everyone who needed me and more than anything, I wanted the boys I knew in Afghanistan, sons of my friends, to come home- alive.
I never promised myself to eat healthier, exercise, save money or try to have more tolerance for the unfortunate dimwits of the world. I fervently hoped to keep the chin level water from getting to my nose.  (Is that where the “chin up” phrase came from? ) Based on that criterion I was successful. 
  
I thought a lot about the world and the people in it; about bigotry, suppression, control, censorship, freedom and the lack thereof. I thought about politics in a different light, a global light and not just our little corner of the world. I read more books in the last six months of 2010 than I had in the last three years – books about different cultures and social issues. I weaned myself from frustration and censorship until the cord was severed clean and said good-bye to seven years of my online life. I thought about women in other countries who are murdered or maimed for looking at a man, or children who beg on the streets for food. 
I wondered why after eight years Iraq is still not on its feet and why after nine years Osama Bin Laden is still able to hide in the mountains between Afghanistan and Pakistan. 
I stressed about social issues closer to home too. I worried about no health insurance and my own inability to afford even when I had two jobs. I worried about homeless people and wondered why it is we are so compassionless towards so many of them. I wondered a lot about a country divided along party lines and like sheep to the slaughter following the dictates of the left or the right no matter how thoughtlessly stupid. I worried about kids not learning to read or write or think for themselves because they are so busy learning to pass a national test so their teachers can keep their jobs.
Some things left me as perplexed as always. Why people beat and /or kill their children, why people are rude to one another, why the courts are jammed with frivolous lawsuits and why the mentally ill can’t get help. Why a city, county, or country doesn’t have to balance its budget like a business and why all accounting is done with smoke and mirrors. I wondered if the economy was going to get worse before it gets better and I wondered if I could eek a few more hours out of the day to get things that needed doing done or get second job if needed.
As always, I wondered about God. I wondered why so many of His believers are sure their version of His existence is the only one that is right and I wondered how he feels about people killing and maiming in His name.
The saddest thing that happened this year was that my old dog Smokie died. But he gave us thirteen great years and the most unconditional love. The best thing that happened is that my family and friends are in good health. Oh, we have had our ups and downs, bruises and bumps, but we’ve survived to tell the story. I never forget how lucky I am to have the family and friends I do.
This weekend I am cleaning house. I’m cleaning closets and drawers and tossing or donating old clothes, shoes and purses. I’m cleaning the kitchen cabinets and dumping old spices and last bits of anything. I’m going to tackle my office and go through all the bills and figure out who I can pay and who has to wait a while longer. I am going to comb through the Writer’s Market book and find a publisher who might like my work- then actually submit.
In 2010 I tread water for 365 days. 2011 will start out cleaner and with some expectation of success by my standards if not yours. Not only will I keep my head above water, I will swim upstream like the strongest salmon. It’s not about resolutions for me- more like a legacy. If I kick the bucket this year or next, I don’t want anyone to be able to say- she was okay with status quo. I don’t want anyone to think I ever gave up on anything or walked away defeated- If I ever walked away it was in victory. If I chip away at some years and steam roll others, I always do my best to make a difference and influence others to do the same.
Happy New Year to my family and friends, without whom– it would be no year at all.

How Stupid Are We?

/ Katie Wigington / Leave a comment

It’s really hard to not be upset with my fellow Americans right now. I think the majority may be morons.



There are people lined up collecting Michael Jackson memorabilia, and showing up at places his body will not be, kids who did not even know who he was, in tow… to mourn a guy that was completely fucked up. I don’t deny that he had musical talent- or that he even had altruistic tendencies. But, this was a guy who could not function in the world. Now that in itself does not make him a bad guy… but he had strange ideas about appropriate behavior with children- which he shared with the world… and apparently 75% of America was not listening. At the end of his life, he looked like Batman’s Joker and surrounded himself with nuts and sycophants. He was a very sick man and no one should be surprised by his death.



Meanwhile, I have a bunch of friends who are holding their breath waiting for word from their Marines in Afghanistan currently involved in Operation Strike of the Sword. Or worse- word from the Marine Corps officials that make those calls none of us ever want. They have to dig for news.



This morning I woke up to Michael Jackson news… at 6AM. There was not a word about the current state of affairs in Iraq or Afghanistan’s Operation Strike of the Sword. Not even a mention of the Marine killed in action, the British Lt.Col killed in action or the missing soldier. Not a word about the many wounded.



It’s easy to blame the news media… but frankly- they are in business to make money and those that aren’t in it for the money- have their political agendas and tailor the news to fit their goal. So I am going to blame the people that continue to listen to the speculation, adulation, and misplaced hero worship the news media is spouting.



How did Americans get so stupid? I’m guilty too. I do stupid stuff when I should read a book, I watch soaps, I waste time, I cyber argue with morons… but I never forget our military in harms way, or the people who have laid down their lives for our freedom or the freedom of others who don’t have the where-with-all to fight for themselves. Unfortunately- this news does not sell advertising.



Now I know- most of you that read my blog feel the same as me… so maybe this is preaching to the choir, but I had to get this off my chest… so I can get on with my day and appreciate the freedoms that some have died to ensure.

Who are we mad at?

/ Katie Wigington / Leave a comment
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It’s easy to be angry. Our loved ones are in a war we sure didn’t ask for; and to the best of my knowledge a war none of our loved ones started.
 
I hear an underlying anger in many of us. Some of us, it’s not so underlying. Who are we mad at exactly? Some of us sound angry at the USMC, our loved ones are underpaid and overworked… and some at our own loved ones for signing up…how could he /she leave our happy home?, The airlines of course… no free rides…and anyone that doesn’t support the troops the way we think they should. (And I think they should too)
Every DOD causality release makes me physically ill and sad. Some days I’m angry. I wish I knew who blame. 
The United States Marine Corps is a fighting force and my son and your loved ones, for the most part- did not join because they wanted a better education, or to see the world or make a lot of money. Most of them joined because of some ideal they have- some concept they could help make the world a little safer, a little saner; a better place to be. Most of them joined after 9/11/2001 so they knew, or should have known, they would be going off to war.
I have no ill will towards the Iraqi people or their government… such as it is. Nor do I hate Islamic beliefs, at least any more than I hate any extreme belief, but not all Islamic are extremist. Even though my son had to dodge their bullets and their IEDS, I am not angry with the people of Iraq. Even some of them are fighting for what they think is right. Fighting for their country…
Some people want to blame the US President or all “westerners” for living the good life and having two cars per family, and a TV for every room in the house, but that will only work for one aspect of the war. What about Afghanistan? We do blame Usama Bin Laden and he blames all American capitalist. Blame Blame Blame…no fixes.
My son tells me the Iraqi people, are just like us. They want the same things we want. The difference is- they have looked death in the eye so many times- that survival is basic, it’s rote, not planned. Some are too tired to fight- some are too scared. No one dreams. He made friends with several Iraqi while there. They couldn’t figure him out- They too have not studied many cultures. His half Japanese face that knew Arabic words was interesting to them.
I know a lot of Afghani’s. Where I used to live was called “Little Kabul” – Nick used to joke that Usama was hiding there- and sometimes I thought- wow- he could be- who would know? Well, the locals would have known- most of them fled Afghanistan for the kind of freedom we have in America. They would have strung him up right there in the center of town.
I felt sorry for the Afghani’s where I lived after 9/11. They all put American Flags in front of their homes…to show support- but also clarify what side they were on. I felt sorry for all the Arabs in our community and the Iranians- who some called Arab- (but they aren’t) too- because so many people didn’t understand who to be mad at. So many people don’t know the difference between Afghanis, Iraqi, Iranians, – the same people don’t know the difference between Chinese, Japanese, Korean and Vietnamese. It’s not that difficult really. It’s okay to ask too- “Where are you from? “ It probably would not hurt to try to understand different cultures. I’m from San Francisco- so different cultures are all I have ever known. I find them fascinating- I love accents and different food. I like to read about different cultures and customs. I think the knowledge makes me a better person- I hope so. 
It’s not so hard to believe that all sane people want to be safe- they want their kids to have food and shelter and medication when they are sick. They would like to know there is a next meal and where it is coming from. They would like water that won’t kill them and heat that will not blow their homes up. And how about some plumbing? That would be high on my list. 
I live in Charlotte NC now. I know an Eastern Indian man with a southern accent. I can never get used to it- even though he is much easier to understand than many people with an Eastern Indian accent are. I get so wrapped up listening to his accent and trying to match it to his face, that I don’t hear what he is saying. I EXPECT him to sound how I expect him to sound. 
Maybe a little understanding will help. Maybe less closed minds and more education can make a difference. Bad guys are everywhere- we don’t have to understand them…they are simple and stupid, but regular people are everywhere too and it could only benefit us to understand the good people of every nation. 
Maybe part of our role in supporting our troops is to better understand – understand the Sunni, Hindu and Isalm, Afghani &; Iraqi. Maybe the answer is out there- but no one knows what it is because no one tries to understand. I’m going to try- I may never get there… but I am going to try.
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This was written for my Marine Parents group.. but it sat unmoderated…but looked at- for many, many hours. Rather than try to explain this to someone who could not tell it was not a political statement… I chose to delete it and post it here instead.