TBI

Veterans Day 2014 ~ Let’s Do Something

/ Katie Wigington / Leave a comment
AMERICAN VETERANS

I’m posting this a little early this year. My niece asked me yesterday to help her with an essay about why we appreciate our veterans.  I started out by renaming it “Why We Should Appreciate our Veterans.” And I explained to her that not everyone does appreciate them. I wasn’t going to write about Veteran’s Day this year at all, because I feel like I’m beating a dead horse and most of the people that read my blog agree with me anyway.  But then I happened across an article in the Washington Times that made me realize I can’t speak up enough when it comes to our veterans.

The article I’m referring to was about Marin County’s radical, conservative talk show personality Michael Savage.  Savage was quoted as saying:

“I am so sick and tired of everyone with their complaints about PTSD, depression. Everyone wants their handheld, and a check — a government check. What are you, the only generation that had PTSD? The only generation that’s depressed? I’m sick of it. I can’t take the celebration of weakness and depression.

See, I was raised a little differently. I was raised to fight weakness. I was raised to fight pain. I was raised to fight depression. Not to give into it. Not to cave into it and cry like a little baby in bed. “Boo-hoo-hoo. Boo-hoo-hoo.” Everyone has depression in their life. Everyone has sickness and sadness and disease. And loss of relatives. And loss of career. Everyone has depression in their life. But if the whole nation is told, “boo-hoo-hoo, come and get a medication, come and get treatment, talk about mental illness.” You know what you wind up with? You wind up with Obama in the White House and liars in every phase of the government. That’s what you wind up with. It’s a weak, sick, nation. A weak, sick, broken nation. And you need men like me to save the country. You need men to stand up and say stop crying like a baby over everything. Stand up already. Stop telling me how sick you are and sad you are. Talk about the good things in your life.

When have you last heard that? Oh, everyone’s holding their hand. “Oh, welcome to Good Morning America, sir. You almost committed suicide, how interesting. Please tell us your story.” Maybe a young child who’s on the edge can commit suicide. What a country. No wonder we’re being laughed at around the world. No wonder ISIS can defeat our military. Take a look at that. Take a look at that, why people aren’t even getting married anymore to have children. They don’t even have the guts to raise a child. The men are so weak, and so narcissistic, all they want to do is have fun. Bunch of losers. Just go have a brewski and look at the 49ers, you idiot, you. They won’t even get married, won’t have a child, it takes too much of a man to do that. What a country. You’re not a man, you’re a dog. A dog raises babies better than most American men do.”

I was so disgusted by his remarks I had to walk away from my computer for the evening. Granted—he is mentally ill. Granted—he is a hate monger, a bigot and an all-around creep, who has never served a day of his life in the military. Who has never seen combat and who has lived a very cushy life with his two Marin County homes, one San Francisco home, private security and oh, yeah, lots of money. He’s such a despicable human being that I am embarrassed he lives in Marin or even the Bay Area—but he does.
Savage often makes ridiculous claims, such as:  “99% of autism cases, it’s a brat who hasn’t been told to cut the act out.”  
In 2009 Savage was banned from the UK on May 5, 2009, then-Home Secretary Jacqui Smith announced that Savage was on a list of individuals banned from entering the United Kingdom as he is “considered to be engaging in unacceptable behavior by seeking to provoke others to serious criminal acts and fostering hatred which might lead to inter-community violence.”
I just want to tell him one thing. All those veterans, from all those wars, paved the way for your rotten mouth to spew your homophobic, xenophobic, bigoted, ignorant, vile and utterly ridiculous thoughts on our airways.  And to the people who listen to Savage—shame on you. 
Originally named Soldiers Heart (Civil War 1861-1865) and also known as Shell Shock, Combat Fatigue, PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)  and finally PTS (Post Traumatic Stress), dropping the “disorder” to help end the stigma. PTS is nothing new, and nothing to scoff about. It can be mild or severe and as debilitating as loss of limb. Getting out of bed can be a struggle, remembering to take your meds, or go to the VA Hospital next to impossible. Families are torn apart from lack of support or understanding. This is not a pull yourself up by your bootstraps kind of thing. No one wants to live in this hell and that is why so many with PTS have committed suicide.
Twenty-two veterans a day, one every 80 minutes, commits suicide. Studies (National Center for PTSD Vol.20) indicate that “10-18% of combat troops serving in OEF/OIF have PTSD following deployment, and the prevalence does not diminish over time.”
If you care about our veterans you’ll stop the blame game and do something to help a veteran.  Politicians may have made this mess, but the American people have the ability to fix it.  Be the solution. Show your appreciation to those who have sacrificed not only years of their lives, but for some– their limbs, their sight, and for so many their peace of mind. Don’t just thank them for their service, show them you care.  
Here are some ways you can help in Marin and the greater Bay Area, by donating, volunteering or guiding a veteran to any of the following:

 

Marin Health and Human Services — Veterans Services
Homeward Bound of Marin – Homeless Veterans Services
College of Marin Veteran Services
Marin Employment Connection  for Veterans
The Pathway Home  (OEF, OIF Veterans with PTS and TBI)
The Veterans Home –Yountville  
The Veterans of Foreign Wars

 

*If you are outside of the Bay Area a simple Google search of “veteran’s resources” in your area will bring up several website.s Check them first to make sure they are legit- if you are not sure- feel free to send me the link and I’ll research it for you.

Don’t Waste It- Memorial Day 2017

/ Katie Wigington / Leave a comment

The lives lost in my son’s unit 2006-7 Iraq 

In memory of all who gave their lives for their country. This is a republished blog from 2012. Sad to say –things have not changed at all. A lot people will have fun this Memorial Day and not give a second thought to how that fun was made possible. Fun is great- I support it- but please remember the folks that can’t celebrate a day because they gave their lives so you could. KW 2017.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All week I have been thinking about what I would write about for Memorial Day. I’ve been told I come off preachy sometimes, but really I know most of the people who read my blog and I fully understand I would be preaching to the choir if I were preaching about this day. The one theme that kept coming back to me regarding Memorial Day, was the theme that came from the movie “Saving Private Ryan” when Tom Hanks was dying and he looked at Matt Daman and said, “Don’t waste it.”
Don’t waste it. Don’t waste your life and don’t squander your freedom. I take that to mean don’t be a lemming. Make a difference. Think about the world and not just your little corner of it. I strive to do this. I have taught myself to be more tolerant- though I don’t always succeed. We always want people to be just like us, think just like us- and yet the world is so big that could never be possible. And that freedom, we are so privileged to have in this great country, is often taken for granted and stomped on by many of us trying to make everyone fit into our groove.
Memorial Day is supposed to be about the troops killed in action. It’s not really supposed to be about thanking all our Veteran’s. But in my thinking, the best way to honor those who have died is to honor those who have lived and help them give their lives new meaning.
A few weeks ago, I wrote about the plight of many veterans suffering from PTS and TBI and about their inability to find jobs that can accommodate their disabilities. Some of them can’t work at all. Many Iraq and Afghanistan veteran’s are homeless, drug and alcohol dependent and many more are suicidal. Many of them found maneuvering the VA so difficult they just gave up and receive no medical care at all.
I’m not sure which part of this people are not understanding. While political factions argue with each other over which is the best party, while they call each other names, spread rumors with zeal, and batter each other in advertisements, our veterans are dying.
In an article written late last year Paul Rieckoff , executive director of the Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America said, “The suicide rate is out of control – it’s epidemic proportions right now. There are very few programs that are effective, and there’s a serious lack of national awareness.”
Read more here: VETERAN SUICIDE EPIDEMIC
A serious lack of National awareness. Still a million people will write about today and they will write about Veteran’s Day later, and people will wave their flags and argue about their right to choose, their right to pray, their right to eat fat, their right to grow pot, their right to raise their kids however they want, their right to be FREE.
Many of our veterans are not free. Some with visible scars and some without, they are shackled to their nightmares. They are buried with their friends who came home in coffins. They walk on tightrope; barely able to balance they hang on for life that is no longer dear.
Those of us that understand all this owe it to these men and women, the walking wounded, to wake the Nation up. We owe it to them to have intelligent conversations that are not politically biased, but about them alone. We owe it to them to stop blaming politicians for something WE can change if we unite in our message that our veteran’s needs must come before one more war, one more special interest, and one more barrel of oil, one more study of frog sex, one more dime spent on any frivolous bull shit thing.
After 11 years of constant war, almost every single person I know has known someone that either has been in the war or been deeply affected somehow. Everyone I talk to has had a son, daughter, sister, brother, nephew, cousin or friend serve in one of the two last wars.
A staggering 45 percent of the 1.6 million veterans from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan are now seeking compensation for injuries they say are service-related. That is more than double the estimate of 21 percent who filed such claims after some other relatively recent wars, top government officials told The Associated Press.
I have not backed off my campaign to raise awareness. If I am preaching – so be it. I don’t know any other way to get the word out. I’m shooting from the hip like I always do. I’m hoping you will share this Memorial Day message with your friends and family. I’m hoping it will make its way to people who want to make things better for our veterans. 1.6 million veterans need our help.
Don’t waste it. If you don’t know the meaning of life- give your own life meaning. Leave this world a better place by repaying the greatest gift given to most of us and earned by so few. The gift of freedom.
Things can change. If you have even a smidgen of the bravery some of the men and women who sacrificed their lives for our freedoms have, you can help make a difference. Speak up for them, don’t just wave your flags and shout out America the Beautiful, or the Pledge of Allegiance. We owe them – don’t you think?

Save Our Veterans

/ Katie Wigington / 3 Comments

They come home as heroes. We – their families and loved ones hang banners, meet buses and wave flags. We are so proud. So relieved. We check their faces for signs of stress. We look at them with a magnifying glass. Still, we don’t see it.

It doesn’t take us long to forget their reality. I bet you can’t wait to get a job, go to school, get married, have kids. Whoa, they say. Hold up a minute- I need to chill a little here.

So, they party and spend their war money. We know the signs, we all read up on this before they come home. But, but, what about that job Uncle Mike wants to give you? We can’t seem to help ourselves.

They are depressed. They sleep. They lock themselves in their rooms and don’t come out for days, sometimes months. They go to bars and fight. They buy their dead buddies drinks and won’t let anyone sit on the bar stool where the drink is sitting. They cry.

I’ll take you to the VA if you need a ride, we tell them. We are met with a blank stare. Or worse. They can’t sleep. When they do sleep they have nightmares. They wake up swinging, hit whoever is in their way. Their guilt increases. They can’t help themselves. They drink some more. They take the pills the VA hands out like candy.

They are reckless. They cheated the odds before why not again? They ride motorcycles, drive fast cars, jump off cliffs with paper wings, walk dark alleys, sleep with strangers. Risk becomes their high.

They rant. They rave. They don’t give a fuck. They hate you. They hate life. Five, six, seven years later. Still holed up in a small, dark room. Can’t get dressed. Can’t watch the news. Can’t read a book. Can’t take a piss without punching the bathroom wall.

Our heroes. Who’re their heroes? Can’t be us. We haven’t done shit for them. Clean your room you’ll feel better. Get a haircut you’ll feel better. You just need to get a job, meet a nice girl, nice guy, get a dog, have some kids, you’ll be fine. Trust me.

They hurt themselves. Some of them need those scars on the outside to explain why the inside is so messed up. They long for war days. It was easier, they tell us. I’d rather be shot at all day long than try to find a fucking job in California, Nebraska, Oklahoma…pick a state.

This is a call out. I’m calling you out to get them some help. We owe them. If you are one of those people that say, I never asked anyone to go to war for me. Then I hope you never need my help. I hope you never need THEIR help. (and please don’t be my friend on anything)

Our heroes are dying before our very eyes. For some, suicide is the only way- because they can’t figure out how to live in this world. We can help them. But we have to be dogged in our resolve. We cannot give up because we hit a few bumps in the road. These are our sons, our daughters, our husbands, wives, nephews, nieces, cousins, neighbors. FRIENDS.